(vol. 10W, no. 1; newsletter by b.n.)
On Wednesday May 22, 2002 the NEW season opened for the “NEW” look Coastal Pirates. The opponents for the night's affair was the same old O'Neills. It wasn't really supposed to be like this: the new season was actually supposed to start two days earlier against the Rhinos, but for whatever reason (most likely because it was a Monday game and no one ever expects to start the season on a Monday night — just ask Roger), the Rhinos were a “no show” on Monday night. So the question becomes, was the game on Wednesday night really the first game of the season? Perhaps it was the second game of the season? To make matters more confusing, the way things are going — most people won't be reading this until after the third game (ok, maybe the second game) of the season. And another thing ... how much of a “NEW” look are these “NEW” look Pirates anyway? For those paying attention, it came as a shock to some that longtime Wednesday-night Pirate, Wildman, decided to leave the brotherhood. So who were the new guys? Well, Scotty Miller has returned, along with his brother Ed (or is it Joe)? Also on the team, is Sunday-night Pirate and still Wednesday-night Crunch (he's playing both this season), Scotty “my kid is going to kick your ass” LeMatty. So really, the team has a more “Old” than "New" look to it. About the only “New” thing that the team sported is the “Back2Back” losing t-shirts that were unveiled in the team meeting after the game. Oh, and another thing: according to Harris, there were two players that failed to submit entries for the season ending awards. Whoever you guys are, I just want to let you know that you are a couple of losers! What kind of team spirit is that? Hopefully, you two go the way of Wildman andBB and disappear from the team you Treacherous Pieces of Crap! Mmmm... Hope I didn't give anything away there ... Oh yeah, the game. But before I get to the game, let me say that this newsletter sets a new record for not only the amount of emails from Harris demanding its completion, but also in the amount of time that has passed since the actual game has been played. Man I hope I can remember some of it.

The game began sometime after 11:00 and backup goalie Doug Collimore was in net. The O'Neills were playing Iron Man (just five skaters) versus our almost complete roster of nine skaters. If it wasn't for the fact that we have a terrible record against teams that “Go Iron” then this could have been a good sign. The first shift had a lot of pressure and kept the O'Neills in their end, but the bad signs continued when one of the O'Neills skated down the right side of the rink and fired a shot from the corner with absolutely no angle. The puck deflected off of some part of Collimore's equipment and went in. Later in the period, one of the Crunch picked up a puck that was not cleared, skated around the face-off dot and headed to the center of the rink; as he fell, he got off a shot that went back the other way and caught the top corner. I am almost certain that the score was 2-0 at the end of the 1st period.

The O'Neills would add two more in the 2nd, including one blast from the blueline. Suddenly it was 4-0 (or as close to suddenly as you can get after playing about 20:00 minutes of hockey). Then the “Seems Like Old Times Pirates” emerged when Scott Miller skated down the right side of the rink and fired the puck from the exact same spot that the O'Neills had scored their first goal from and "What do ya know?" — it was a goal! At some point in the 2nd, Roger absolutely lost it. He apparently was upset about a non-call and took his stick to the ref and league director, Scott Baldwin, and demonstrated and asked “Tell me that is not a penalty!” Well, yes Roger it WAS a penalty which WAS called. In all the ensuing chaos, Glenn Farkas had a breakaway shorthanded, but missed the net. Down two men at another point, the Pirates were able to survive the period without making things (much) worse. Score after the 2nd was 4-1.

In the 3rd, the Pirates started to gain momentum when #67 picked off a pass behind the O'Neills net and fed a wide-open Evan in front who converted to make the score. Things started to get interesting when the Pirates learned an interesting fact: when a team has only five skaters and a player from either team gets tossed into the penalty box for incidental minors, it is in fact a power play! With no one on the bench to replace the O'Neill that was sent to the penalty box, the Pirates found themselves on a 2:00-minute powerplay. The Pirates didn't score on that powerplay, but the excitement was not over; late in the period, Doug Collimore steered a puck to the boards where it was picked up by Glen Chambers who fed it up to Farkas who skated-up and scored. Roger took his third penalty of the night with just over 2:00 minutes to play, but the Pirates were able to kill that one off and with just :19 seconds remaining (and the face-off in our own zone), Collimore was pulled for the extra attacker. The O'Neills won the ensuing face-off, but the shot from the point was wide. The loose puck was picked-up by #67 who fed it to LeMatty at the far blueline. LeMatty one-timed it to Russ who was crossing the blueline. With all the O'Neills piled on him, Russ was unable to get a shot off as the period expired though.

LOST 4-3


His first game back after spending a season on the “DL” and he nets a goal.

For strong play that shut down the O'Neills in the second half of the game and allowed us to get back in.

For his hustle and for filing the latest newsletter ever.