(vol. 22W, no. 6; newsletter by k.r.)
Once again Monday is Wednesday at GoodSports as the Pirates squared-off against arguably the worst-named team in the league, the Bottom Feeders. The Pirate ten-man crew was intact except for Dave Mathews who was off diving the Texas Tower (if you don't know what that is then ask Dave, who can recount the tale better than the History Channel); meanwhile, above sea level, Mike took over Dave's position on the blueline. The lines at the drop of the puck were Chris-Wildman-Craig and Russ-The Miller Bros. Manning the defensive units were Keith-Mike and Brian-Gucci. The lines would change at the break, but we will get to that later, as we have a tight 1st period battle to talk about.

Although this one would end up as a 6-1 Pirates victory it seemed anything but (editor's note: you're not supposed to end a sentence with “but,” but I couldn't think of any way of avoiding it). The Bottom Feeders are a great skating team — not to mention a little loose with the sticks — so it took everything for the Pirates to withstand their advances. Just like on the previous night, the Pirates would start off the scoring when Craig fed Chris for his first of what would be two goals on the evening; the goal came at the 13:00-minute mark, but the lead only lasted 2:00 minutes as the opposition evened things up quickly. The half ended with the teams gridlocked 1-1.

With the Pirates scoring only one goal in the 1st period, Chris decided to change things up on the forward lines: He flip-flopped centers and the move turned-out to open the proverbial floodgates in the final 22:00 minutes (speaking of “floodgates,” did we mention that Dave was going to attempt access to the flooded crew compartments on the Texas Tower?). Although the five goals that followed gave the Pirates a commanding lead, the Bottom Feeders were by no means outplayed — the Pirates were simply consistently taking advantage of the opportunities as they arose. First, Chris returned the favor to Craig when he fed a pass to Keith on the point, who one-timed it to Craig for a great tip in. Craig then took matters into his own hands on an unassisted goal shortly after, giving the white-jersey-clad Pirates a 3-1 lead. It was then back to Chris, who tallied his second, and then The Miller Bros. each contributed one of their own to close out the night's scoring. At the end the scoreboard was a little deceiving, but we'll take it. Remember, as it was so eloquently said in the parking lot: “Cigar smoke can hurt you, a car accident can hurt you ... and playing hockey with Mike Farrell can hurt you.”
date of game: 6.27.05

WON 6-1


For his 3-point, 2-goal game. Ironically, this will be Chris' last game until mid-July due to a partially torn adductor muscle and “a big blood thing.” We are investigating reports that Chris may have aggravated his injury in non-Pirate sanctioned activities — such as motorcross, where he is shown below.

For finally making a Monday night appearance, and scoring 2 goals (including the GWG).

For a 2-point effort — not bad considering he was in the dentist's chair getting work done a few hours before.