25W, no. 3; newsletter by h.s.)
And now it's time for the Pirate Puzzler™ — the official brain-teaser of Coastal Pirates hockey.
Today's Pirate Puzzler™
What was the worse thing about last night's game?
a) Russ pulled a hamstring in the 1st period and is now day-to-day.
b) Two Pirates were A.W.O.L. which reduced the bench to just two subs after Russ got hurt.
c) I called Kevin and told him not to come because we had a full roster (see above).
d) The Pirates still haven't won this season.
e) All of the above.
The answer, of course, is “f” — “Brian is not on the squad this year so I have to write the newsletter.”
For the third game of the Spring season the Pirates faced the newly-revamped Phantoms. In fact, “newly-revamped” is the key adjective in describing just about every team the Pirates have played, as each squad seems to have added some major talent to their rosters. With two of the Pirates starting defensemen out of the lineup, the Men In White once-again rotated Nick (“You're Screwed”) Garguilo on the blueline with Gucci and a subbing Joe Baio. Up front was Russ, Craig Sudol, The Miller Bros. and a-running-in-at-the-last-moment-once-again Wildman.
The Phantoms took the 1-0 lead off a blast from the circle and held it for what seemed like a long time until Wildman (assist to Gucci) knotted things up at the middle of the 1st period. That 1-1 score was brief however, as the Phantoms answered back on the next shift to regain their lead 2-1. With about 7:00 minutes remaining in the 1st period, the long-dormant Pirate powerplay awoke and Craig (assist to Gucci) tied it back up with authority. So, going into the break things were looking pretty okay for the Pirates. That is until what we call “22:00 Minutes in Hell” ...
Okay, perhaps “22:00 Minutes in Hell” is a bit of an overstatement, but things seemed to spiral out of control in the last frame. For starters, number 97 on the Phantoms would score three more times (adding to his one that he had in the 1st period). The Pirates did make a spirited comeback attempt with 8:00 minutes on the clock when Joe Baio finished a punt-pass-kick contest from Nick and Evan. That reduced the score to 5-3, but the two-goal deficit was shortlived as the Phantoms would tally one more before the night was over.
The only other thing of note occurred at the post-game “meeting” while we were discussing how TiVO has a “brain” and tapes shows that it thinks you like. Gucci recounted how he made the mistake of taping “Queer as Folk” and had an interesting mix of taped programs based on his viewing patterns ...
date of game: 3.13.06
1) JOE BAIO
For a ton of blocked shots and a goal to boot.
2) DARREN GUGGLIELMELLI
For a ton of shots (many of which nearly went through the posts that he hit so hard) and 2 assists.